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‘Mrs Fitzgerald, ‘ he said sternly. ‘This is no place for a member of my congregation. Why don’t you let me take you home?’‘Sure, ‘ she said with a slur, obviously very drunk.When Mrs Fitzgerald stood up from the bar, she began to weave back and forth. The Reverend realized that she’d had far too much to drink and grabbed her arms to steady her. When he did, they both lost their balance and tumbled to the floor.After rolling around for a few moments, the Reverend wound up on top of Mrs. Fitzgerald, her skirt hiked up to her waist.The pub landlord looked over and said, ‘Oi Mate, we won’t have any of that carrying on in this pub.’The Reverend looked up at the landlord and said, ‘But you don’t understand, I’m Pastor Flapps.’The landlord nodded and said, ‘Oh well, if you’re that far in, you might as well finish.’This one is compliments of J & BSEX and GRAMMAROn his 70th birthday, a man was given a gift certificate from his wife. The certificate was for consultation with an Indian medicine. "Gene was a happy hippie. He had long dirty hair and sandals, and all the marijuana he could smoke, and to top it all off, a job where he could sit and listen to records all night and still get paid for it. Gene, among other things, was the night watchman for WRT-TV, and his sole responsibility was sitting in the control booth until the announcer had finished giving the midnight news, and then flip the switches which would close down the transmission system for the night. Once an hour thereafter, Gene was supposed to walk around the studio and check to make sure everything was quiet, and the rest of the time, he could play rock and roll records on the studio's turn-table and smoke marijuana, the two things he loved best in the world.Recently, Mr. Agard had been working late in the shooting studio, and Gene had been told to stay out, which further reduced his responsibilities and gave him more time to indulge in his two favorite pastimes. But Gene had a certain sense of duty, and he.
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